How to Get Six Pack Abs Fast

Everywhere you turn, someone's promising the next secret to getting 6 pack abs. While there's no way to get a 6 pack overnight, regular exercise and a healthy diet can help put you on the fast track. Develop an ab workout routine with a variety of exercises, such as crunches and planks. Your muscles need fuel, and you might need to burn fat to see results, so be sure to stick to a healthy, balanced diet.

Steps

Doing Crunch Variations

1. Do 4 sets of 12 basic crunches. Start by lying on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Place your fingertips behind your head, inhale, then exhale as you raise your upper back off of the floor. Raise your torso for about 2 seconds, then gently inhale as you lower yourself back to the floor.^[1]
   
   • Be sure not to tug your head upward with your hands. Keep your head, neck, and back aligned, and avoid arching your lower back as you lift your torso. Repeat the steps to complete a set of 12 crunches.
   • Raise your torso just enough to lift your shoulder blades off of the ground. A crunch can safely engage your abs, but a full sit-up (or raising yourself all the way to your knees) can strain the lower back.
   • To increase difficulty, try holding a weight over your torso as you do crunches. Start out light, such as with a plate weight, to avoid injury.^[2]
2. Lift your knees and hips to do reverse crunches. To start, lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Keep your arms by your sides with your palms facing down. Exhale and engage your abs as you raise your knees over your hips.^[3]
   
   • Keep your knees bent at a 90-degree angle as you hold them directly over your hips. Inhale, then exhale as you lift your hips and lower back off the floor with a smooth, controlled motion.
   • Inhale again as you lower your hips back to the floor, but keep your knees above your hips. Repeat the steps to complete a set of 12 reverse crunches. After the last repetition, lower your feet back to the floor.
3. Add bicycle crunches to your routine. Lie on your back with your knees bent and fingertips touching the back of your head. Inhale, then exhale as you raise your feet off of the floor. Make a pedalling motion by driving your left knee toward your torso and extending the other straight.^[4]
   
   • As you pedal, raise your shoulder blades off of the floor and rotate your torso to bring your right elbow toward your bent left knee.
   • Then, straighten your left leg as you raise your right knee toward your torso. Simultaneously, rotate your torso to bring your left elbow toward your right knee.
   • Continue to pedal and rotate your torso to complete 12 repetitions per side.
4. Extend your arms to do overhead crunches. Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Straighten your arms above your head with your palms facing up. Your arms should still touch the floor, and your biceps (upper arms) should be near your ears.^[5]
   
   • Keeping your arms extended above your head, lift your torso as if you were doing a conventional crunch. Remember to keep your head, neck, and spine aligned, and don't arch your lower back.
   • As with standard crunches, you can hold a lightweight plate in your hands to add resistance.

Mastering Plank Exercises

1. Plank with proper technique to avoid getting injured. Start by lying on your stomach with your head facing down, forearms on the floor, and palms flat on the floor. Inhale, then exhale as you lift your body off of the floor so your forearms and toes carry your weight. Keep your elbows bent at 90-degree angles directly under your shoulders.^[6]
   
   • Engage your core muscles so your head, neck, and spine form a straight line. Keep your head down throughout the plank so you continually face the floor.^[7]
   • Try holding the plank for 10 to 15 seconds. Continue to breathe as you hold the position. If planking for 10 to 15 seconds isn't challenging, try increasing the time to 30 to 45 seconds.
2. Sculpt your abs and obliques with side planks. Start by lying on your right side with your right elbow bent directly under your shoulder. Your left leg should be stacked directly over your right leg. Inhale, then exhale as you engage your core muscles and extend your elbow to a 90-degree angle.^[8]
   
   • Keep your elbow bent directly under your shoulder. Your head, neck, and spine should make a straight line.
   • Continue breathing as you hold the side plank. Try holding it for 10 to 15 seconds, or go for 30 to 45 seconds if a shorter duration isn't challenging. Slowly lower yourself back to the starting position, then repeat the steps on your left side.
   • To increase difficulty, raise your upper leg off of your lower leg as you hold a side plank.
3. Challenge yourself with extended planks. Start on your stomach as if you were doing a standard plank. Straighten your arms above your head with your palms touching the floor. Engage your core as you use your fingertips and toes to lift your body off of the floor.^[9]
   
   • Keep your head in a neutral position so you're facing the floor throughout the plank. Your head, neck, and spine should form a straight line.
   • Try to hold the plank for 15 seconds. Continue breathing as you hold the position, then slowly lower yourself back to the floor.
   • If you're not able to keep your back straight during an extended plank, stick to standard planks.

Developing a Safe, Effective Routine

1. Warm up and cool down for 5 to 10 minutes. Go for a brisk walk or jog, do jumping jacks, run in place, or jump rope at the start of your workouts. Moderate aerobic exercise will increase blood flow to your muscles, which reduces your risk of injuring yourself. When you finish working out, cool down for 5 to 10 minutes to help your muscles recover.^[10]
   
2. Include multiple crunches and plank variations in your routine. Instead of just trying to do 500 crunches, your workouts should consist of a variety of exercises. A good routine could be:^[11]
   
   • 5 to 10-minute jog
   • 3 sets of 12 repetitions each: standard crunches, overhead crunches, reverse crunches
   • 3 sets of 12 repetitions per side: bicycle crunches
   • 2 sets of 30 seconds: standard planks, extended planks
   • 2 sets of 30 seconds per side: side planks
3. Do your ab workout routine 3 to 4 times per week. As much as you want abs fast, pushing yourself too hard could result in an injury. Avoid exercising your abs or any other muscle group on back to back days.^[12]
   
   • Everyone's body is unique, but you might see results within a few weeks. Don't be hard on yourself if it takes longer. Try to focus on being as healthy as possible instead of pushing yourself and risking injury.
   • Additionally, if you're just starting, it's wise to take it slow. Try starting with 2 sets of 10 repetitions for each exercise, then gradually work your way up to 3 sets of 12 reps.
   • Avoid exercising or stretching if your muscles are sore. If you have a muscle strain, working out will make matters worse.
4. Burn belly fat with cardio exercises. To see the results of your hard work, you'll need to burn fat deposits that cover the abdominal muscles. For a good cardio workout, jog for 5 to 10 minutes, sprint for 10 minutes, then jog for another 5 to 10 minutes.^[13]
   
   • Jogging, sprinting, then jogging again is a form of interval training. This type of cardio exercise is a great way to burn fat.^[14]
   • In addition to running, you could swim laps, ride your bike, do jumping jacks, and jump rope.

Following a Fat-Burning Diet

1. Pack plenty of protein sources into your diet. Protein helps build muscle, but it's important to choose higher-fat options.^[15] These poultry, fish, legumes, nuts, eggs, and full-fat dairy products. Go for these instead of processed meats, like bacon.
   
   • The right amount of protein per day depends on your age, sex, and activity level. In general, go for at least of per day. For example, have of grilled chicken over a salad for lunch, and of salmon for dinner.^[16]
   • If you're highly active, you might need even more daily protein. Learn more about your specific requirements at https://www.myplate.gov/.
2. Fill up on fruits and veggies to cut your calories. Fruits and veggies are packed with essential nutrients, and they can fill you up without adding extra calories. Your required amount depends on your age, sex, and activity level. In general, go for about of fruits and of veggies per day.^[17]
   
   • When you're hungry between meals, grab a healthy snack, like a banana, apple, or carrot sticks.
3. Don't skip healthy complex carbs. Grains are rich in fibre and fuel your muscles, so go for brown rice, quinoa, and whole-grain bread, kinds of pasta, and cereals. Try to consume around of grains per day; half that amount should be whole grains.^[18]
   
   • You might have heard that you need to cut carbs to lose weight. Consider a ketogenic diet, at least temporarily, if you need to lose fat. If you're not following a ketogenic diet, healthy grains are an important part of your diet, and they provide your muscles with the resources needed to grow. Just don't overeat them.
4. Cut out sweets and processed foods. You won't see a 6 pack any time soon if you get most of your calories from processed foods, sweets, and fast food. If you need to satisfy your sweet tooth, swap pastries, ice cream, and other unhealthy snacks for peanut butter, Greek yoghurt, and fruit.
   
   • Additionally, steer clear of unhealthy snacks, like chips, and processed meats, such as deli meats and bacon.
5. Drink loads of water instead of high-calorie drinks. Staying hydrated is important for your overall health, especially if you've started exercising more often. Furthermore, swapping soda, sweet tea, and other high-calorie beverages for water will help keep your calories in check.^[19]
   
   • As a rule of thumb, go for at least of water per day. Keep in mind when the weather's hot or you're working out a lot, you'll need to drink more to make up for excess sweating.
   • Looking for even more ways to get a six pack? See what wikiHow users are saying on the "I want six pack abs. Tell me your secrets!" forum page.

How Do I Work Out My Abs With Yoga?

Exercises and Workout Routines for Six-Pack Abs

Six Pack Ab Exercises

Six Pack Ab Exercises

Video

Reader Videos

Tips

• Have a meal with a good source of protein after exercising. It'll help you recover from the workout and help build muscle.
• If you're a pre-teen or teen, it's wise to check with your doctor or gym teacher before working out. Since your bones, joints, and muscles are still growing, they're more prone to injury.
• Consult a doctor or fitness professional before exercising, especially if you have a history of any medical conditions.

Warnings

• Be careful if your body isn't used to strenuous exercise. Take it easy at first and ease your way into it. Remember it's best to consult your doctor before starting a new exercise regimen.

Related wikiHows

• Eat to Get a Six‐Pack
• Do a 6 Pack Abs Workout
• Get Six Pack Abs Fast
• Strengthen Your Core
• Do Crunches
• Do Sit Ups

References

Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://www.acefitness.org/resources/everyone/exercise-library/52/crunch/
2. ↑ https://www.acefitness.org/resources/pros/expert-articles/4886/strengthen-your-core-with-this-ab-circuit-workout/
3. ↑ https://www.acefitness.org/resources/everyone/exercise-library/76/reverse-crunch/
4. ↑ https://www.acefitness.org/resources/everyone/exercise-library/241/supine-bicycle-crunches/
5. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=myg3Sob4LtQ
6. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/straight-talk-on-planking-2019111318304
7. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/strengthening-your-core-right-and-wrong-ways-to-do-lunges-squats-and-planks-201106292810
8. ↑ https://www.acefitness.org/resources/everyone/exercise-library/101/side-plank-with-straight-leg/
9. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/straight-talk-on-planking-2019111318304
10. ↑ https://www.heart.org/en/healthy-living/fitness/fitness-basics/warm-up-cool-down
11. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/want-a-stronger-core-skip-the-sit-ups
12. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/want-a-stronger-core-skip-the-sit-ups
13. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/newsletter_article/taking-aim-at-belly-fat
14. ↑ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23210120/
15. ↑ https://www.eatright.org/health/essential-nutrients/protein/how-teen-athletes-can-build-muscles-with-protein
16. ↑ https://www.myplate.gov/eat-healthy/protein-foods
17. ↑ https://www.cdc.gov/healthy-weight-growth/healthy-eating/fruits-vegetables.html
18. ↑ https://www.myplate.gov/eat-healthy/grains
19. ↑ https://www.cdc.gov/healthy-weight-growth/water-healthy-drinks/index.html

How to Get a Job With No Experience

Recent graduates often struggle to get a job because many positions, even entry-level jobs, require one to two years of work experience. What most people don't realize is that in many instances they already have the necessary experience and skills. This can come through part-time work, internships, or even volunteer experience. In order to get a job with no experience, you need to leverage the personal and professional experiences you have, highlight your skills and accomplishments, and hone your job hunting skills.

Job-Seeking with No Experience

1. Focus on job listings for entry-level positions.
2. Promote your practical skills on your resume.
3. Explain how those skills transfer to the job.
4. Consider interning or volunteering for experience.
5. Take classes to gain skills.
6. Network with industry experts when you can.

Steps

Developing Work Experience

1. Volunteer in a position related to your desired field. If you are struggling to get a job in your desired field because you don't have enough work experience, you should volunteer in your field. This will help you get some real-life work experience and you will begin to develop some of the skills that will be important to future employers.^[1]
   
   • For instance, if you would like to be a social worker, you could volunteer at a homeless shelter or become a Big Brother or Big Sister.
2. Apply to an internship. Unpaid or even paid internships are an excellent way for entry-level job seekers to gain concrete experience working in the field. Search through online job boards and company websites for internship opportunities.
   
   • For example, some companies will hire a summer intern to take on general office duties such as filing, data entry, and answering phones. This can give you experience working in an office and will allow you to meet people in your field.
3. Develop your expertise. If you are trying to break into fields like writing, film editing, or interior design, create sample products to show to potential employers. For example, if you want to be a writer, you could start a blog. This will demonstrate that you have experience creating written material on a regular basis.^[2]
   
   • You could also offer to do pro bono work for a prominent blog or website and ask for a referral in exchange.
   • This will also help you build your personal portfolio.
4. Get a part-time job. Even if you can't land a job in your desired field, take on a part-time job. Employers will often put some weight onto any form of work experience, even your first part-time job. This early work experience could be leveraged to demonstrate that you have developed communication, customer service, and problem solving skills.
   
   • For example, apply to part-time jobs in retail, fast food, or even serving and bartending. This experience can be invaluable.
   • Working a part-time job is a great way to get references, which a lot of employers look for when they're considering hiring someone.

Highlighting Your Skills and Accomplishments

1. List all of your skills. The reason that employers place so much emphasis on work experience is because they want to ensure that you have developed the skills necessary to complete the job. As a result, it is very important that you clearly list and highlight all relevant skills. Some skills to consider include:^[3]
   
   • Computer skills: This can include working with Windows and Mac operating systems, typing over 60 words per minute, proficiency with PowerPoint or other Microsoft Office programs, web programming, blogging, content management systems, databases, graphic design and more.
   • Communication skills: Includes anything from public speaking, writing, training, and listening to facilitating teamwork.
   • Problem-solving and research skills: Students and bloggers have finely honed research skills that can be an asset to a company. People with organizational or office management skills can also boast exceptional problem solving skills.
   • Managerial or leadership skills: If you have ever led a project at your job, through a charity, or amongst friends, then you have experience developing leadership skills.
2. Relate your skills to your experiences. Although it is essential to know and understand all of the skills that you have developed over the years, it is even more important that you can relate those skills to past work or volunteer experience. This will demonstrate to a potential employer that you have actually put your skills into practice.^[4]
   
   • It is one thing to say “I have excellent written communication skills,” but is even more impressive to say “I have 2,500 followers on my blog, which focuses on creative writing.”
3. Explain how these skills are transferable to the job or industry. You have likely developed numerous skills through extra-curricular activities and the connection between these activities and your dream job, may not be obvious. For example, perhaps your hobby is soccer. This does not immediately transfer to a position in IT, but if you coached a soccer team or organized a league, you can demonstrate that you have concrete leadership abilities.^[5]
   
4. Identify any awards you have won. Awards and recognition can help to give weight to some of the standard statements that are common on a resume. For example, you may state that you are a hard worker. You can back this up by demonstrating that you won an employee of the month award in your previous part-time work. Include on your resume any awards or recognition, from employee of the month, to a top retail associate, to a dean's list commendation. Awards and honours should be listed on your resume to show your dedication and exceptional work ethic.^[6]
   
   • You should also include any awards or recognition you gained through volunteer work.

Honing Your Job Hunting Skills

1. Create an effective resume. In order to help with your job search, you want to have a resume that clearly highlights your skills and relates them to your current job. You can actually organize the experience section of your resume into different skills. For example, you could list communication skills and then provide examples or when and how you have developed those skills through different work, intern, and volunteer positions.
   
   • Always tweak your resume and cover letter to fit the job you are applying for. This will demonstrate to a potential employer that you have taken the time to research and consider the posting.
   • If you're not the strongest writer or you're worried about formatting your resume correctly, ask a friend to help! You can also find resume templates online that will make the process easier for you.
   • Remember to make it scannable in a short amount of time. List things that immediately cause people to think, “This person can probably create value.”
2. Network with people in the industry. Use social media sites, such as LinkedIn to reach out to and meet with people in the industry. You can also network at local community events or job fairs. This network may be able to recommend jobs, help you develop skills, and answer any questions you may have about the industry.^[7]
   
3. Search through online job sites. Use job sites like Monster.com, CareerBuilder.com, Indeed.com, and SimplyHired.com to begin looking for entry-level job titles. These sites will allow you to search for specific jobs or more generally at career fields, such as teaching or advertising.
   
   • Define your search by choosing 0 to 2 years of experience. This will remove jobs that require more experience.
4. Apply to jobs. Most job search engines will allow you to apply for jobs directly through their site. You should apply to as many jobs as possible, even if you do not have all of the required experience that was listed on the job post. For example, the post may say two to three years of experience is preferred. This likely means that they will consider candidates that do not have exactly two years of experience.
   
5. Practice your interviewing skills. In order to be successful in an interview, you should thoroughly research the company. This way you will appear knowledgeable about both the job and company goals and objectives. You should also practice some interview questions with a friend or family member. This will give you an opportunity to speak out loud and determine exactly how you will answer potential questions.^[8]
   
   • This type of preparation will allow you to appear confident and relaxed in an interview setting.
   • Show that you're confident in the experience you do have but also eager to learn more. Employers want to hire people that are driven to succeed.

How Can You Get A Job With No Experience?

Tips

• Apply to multiple jobs, even if you don't fit all of the requirements. Your combined work, education, and skill set may make you an ideal candidate.

References

Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://www.selloutyoursoul.com/2015/09/23/how-do-i-get-a-job-without-experience/
2. ↑ https://www.selloutyoursoul.com/2015/09/23/how-do-i-get-a-job-without-experience/
3. ↑ https://www.fastcompany.com/3046146/how-can-i-get-a-good-job-with-no-experience
4. ↑ https://www.selloutyoursoul.com/2015/09/23/how-do-i-get-a-job-without-experience/
5. ↑ https://www.selloutyoursoul.com/2015/09/23/how-do-i-get-a-job-without-experience/
6. ↑ https://www.selloutyoursoul.com/2015/09/23/how-do-i-get-a-job-without-experience/
7. ↑ https://www.fastcompany.com/3046146/how-can-i-get-a-good-job-with-no-experience
8. ↑ https://www.monster.com/career-advice/article/practice-makes-perfect-how-to-rehearse-for-your-next-job-interview-hot-jobs

How to Deal with Dating Anxiety

Dating can make anyone feel nervous, but it can feel especially tough if you're someone who has anxiety. Fortunately, you can reduce and overcome dating anxiety by changing your mindset to transform your dating experience into something full of fun and play. We'll teach you how to cope with anxiety by focusing on finding connections rather than finding "the one." Plus, we'll teach you how to take the pressure off dating with tools and strategies to manage your feelings of anxiety.

Steps

Changing Your View of Dating

1. Adopt a “practice makes perfect” attitude about dating. Treat dating just like any other skill--you will not be perfect every time, it is a skill that can be practiced, and it takes time and effort to be good at it. Consider each date you go on as a chance to practice your skills rather than a "success or failure" mentality. If you make a mistake, try to laugh at yourself and remind yourself that it’ll make a great story one day.
   
   • Dating is a way of seeing if you enjoy and are compatible with your potential love interest. It is not a test of you overall as a person. If the date does not work out, or it is not a good match, that only means that this particular situation is not a long term one.
   • It’s okay if you have setbacks when it comes to dating. When you’re building a skill, you won’t have a steady path of progress. There are always going to be obstacles.
   • Everyone feels nervous on a first date, and it's normal to make mistakes. You're doing just fine!
2. Focus on making connections with people who interest you. You might be feeling anxious about dating because you feel pressure to fall in love or find a partner. Relieve this pressure by looking at dating as a chance to relate to other people. When you go on a date, get to know the person and search for common interests. It doesn’t matter if it goes farther than a few dates. What’s important is that you’ll have made a connection with them.
   
   • If it helps, create a list of questions you want to ask them before the date. You might ask, “What are you most excited about?” "What do you respect most about your mother or father?" "What's the most thoughtful gift you've received?" or "Tell me about a time that something didn't go as planned but ended up helping you get to where you are now."
3. Stop looking for “the one” on every date. Trying to fall in love is stressful, so it’s understandable that you’d feel anxious. However, you’re probably going to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a good partner, so take the pressure off yourself. Give yourself permission to take your time and go on a lot of dates as you look for a good partner.
   
   • When you meet a person that’s an awful match for you, treat it like a success. You now know something you don’t want in a partner!
4. Be your own source of love and validation to take the pressure off. It can feel like you need a partner to complete you, but this simply isn’t true. The only person who can truly complete you is yourself! Instead of looking for a partner who will meet your needs, figure out what you want and give it to yourself. This will help you approach dating with a relaxed, open mind.
   
   • For instance, tell yourself things like, “You’re enough,” “You can do this,” and “Your hard work is going to pay off.”
   • If you want something, go out and get it for yourself. As an example, buy yourself nice jewelry or start saving for a house.

Coping with Your Feelings

1. Allow yourself to feel your emotions. Give yourself permission to experience your emotions, then try to name how you’re feeling. For instance, you might feel worried, afraid, or confused about dating and relationships. Don’t try to fight your feelings! Letting yourself feel them is the first step to helping them pass.
   
   • You might say to yourself, “I’m feeling really afraid because my last relationship went so badly,” or “I’m worried that all relationships end because my parents got divorced.”
2. Identify the reasons you feel anxious about dating. Think about why you feel nervous and about the relationships you’ve had in the past. Additionally, consider the relationships that your family members had between each other. Then, write down the reasons why you think that dating might make you anxious. Once you know why you’re nervous, you can start to address those concerns.
   
   • For instance, you might realize that you’re anxious because you’ve been used in the past. Similarly, dating might make you nervous because your older sibling had a bad experience with an ex.
3. Express your feelings of anxiety to help you manage them. Keeping your feelings bottled up makes things worse. You need to find a natural release that works for you. Here are some ways you might express your anxiety:^[1]
   
   • Talk to someone about how you feel.
   • Scream into a pillow.
   • Try shaking your body to release your anxious emotions. Work from your shoulders down to your feet, shaking your body as you go.
   • Write your feelings in a journal.
4. Use breathing exercises to calm yourself down. Try the 4-7-8 breathing technique to help you release your emotions. Press your tongue behind the top of your teeth, then inhale through your nose for a 4 count. Hold your breath for a 7 count, then release a whooshing breath to an 8 count. Repeat 3-4 times without pausing between breaths.
   
   • This should help energize you with oxygen, which will help you relieve anxiety and stress.
5. Exercise daily to help release your feelings of anxiety. When you exercise, your body burns off excess energy, which helps reduce your anxiety. Additionally, exercise releases endorphins that make you feel happier. Choose an exercise you enjoy so you’ll be able to do it every day, such as the following:^[2]
   
   • Join a recreational sports team.
   • Take a dance class.
   • Go to the gym with a friend.
   • Walk in nature.
   • Run.
   • Do water aerobics.

Improving Your Dating Life

1. Look for ways to relate to other people in your daily life. Be curious about the people you meet. Ask them questions about themselves, look for common interests, and keep an open mind. Try to share something about yourself, as well. As you get better at relating to people, dating will come more easily.^[3]
   
   • This comes back to making a connection with others. By learning to relate with people, you’ll be more comfortable on dates.
   • For instance, talk to people in line at the grocery store, start a conversation while you’re in a waiting room, or invite your coworkers out to lunch.
2. Try out different ways of flirting with people. Flirting can help you make a quick connection with someone and express an interest in them. Since you can do it without going on a date, it’s a great way to test the waters with people to help you slowly move past your anxieties about dating. Here are some easy ways to flirt:^[4]
   
   • Laugh and smile a lot.
   • Make brief eye contact, then look away.
   • Give the person a compliment.
   • Show off your neck.
   • Touch the person on their arm.
   • Mirror their body language.
   • Ask about a shared interest.
3. Choose fun activities for your dates to avoid awkward conversations. Sitting across from someone at a dinner table can feel really scary, especially if you’ve just met them. Instead of putting the focus of your date on conversation, invite the person on an active date. This will keep you out of your head so you’re less likely to feel anxious. Here are some date ideas:
   
   • Go bowling.
   • Play mini golf.
   • Attend a concert.
   • Take a dancing lesson.
   • Go to a cooking class.
   • Attend a local festival.
4. Focus on what your date is doing or saying to get out of your thoughts. Overthinking things during your date will increase your anxiety. However, you can avoid this by paying close attention to your date. Actively Listen to everything your date says, and repeat what they say back to them. Additionally, watch their body language and how they move so you’re focused on the moment.^[5]
   
   • Don’t worry about figuring out what your date might be thinking. Just be with them in the moment.
   • If your date isn’t saying much, try asking them open-ended questions to encourage them to talk. You might ask, “What’s the most interesting thing about your job?” or “How did you get started with your hobby?”
5. Keep the conversation fun during your first few dates. You might get nervous about dating because it’s difficult to open up to people. However, there’s no rush to reveal everything about yourself. When you first start dating someone, stick to light, fun topics, such as your hobbies or funny stories.^[6]
   
   • For instance, you don’t need to tell them about your past relationships. Instead, talk about your latest interests.

Video

Tips

• Give yourself all the time you need to work through your dating anxiety. You can do this!
• Ask your friends to go on pretend dates with you. This might help you overcome your anxiety.

Warnings

• If your anxiety feels overwhelming, it’s best to talk to a therapist who can help you learn how to manage it.

References

Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://blogs.psychcentral.com/nlp/2018/06/anxiety-in-dating-and-new-relationships/
2. ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/diagnosis-treatment/drc-20350967
3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201106/how-reduce-dating-anxiety
4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/valley-girl-brain/201203/how-flirt-without-it-seeming-youre-flirting
5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201106/how-reduce-dating-anxiety
6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201106/how-reduce-dating-anxiety

How to Enjoy Being Single

Learn from expert dating coaches on how to embrace singledom

Being single doesn’t have to be all about drinking wine by yourself every night, pining over a romantic comedy, or a distant crush. Being single can give you amazing freedom and provide you with an opportunity to polish your own life skills and deepen your life experience. That way, if and when you do choose to leave the single life behind you will have plenty of independent living under your belt. The key to enjoying your single life is to make the most of your time, take advantage of your freedom, and prepare for a relationship.

Being Happily Single

Focus on yourself—travel the world, find a job that you love, and prioritize your close friendships. Work on personal goals like learning a new skill or developing a self-care routine. You can also prepare for future relationships by reflecting on exes or working on your flaws (with a counselor, if needed).

Steps

Taking Advantage of Your Freedom

1. Define what being single means for you. Regardless of your situation and reason for being single, it's important for you to identify what being single means to you, especially if you do see/think yourself in a relationship in the future. Practice not always needing another person's validation or understanding. Learn to be comfortable being alone, and practice loving and accepting yourself as a single person.
   
   • Find out what other readers love about flying solo on wikiHow's "What do you like about being single?" forum!
2. Take a spontaneous trip. Because you don't have to worry about another person's preferences or schedule, you can go where you want, when you want! You can take a day off of work to make a day trip to an unfamiliar city nearby, or perhaps a weekend trip in your own city, to explore freely.^[1]
   
   • Being single also means you get to choose your destination. You don’t have to compromise or go somewhere you have no interest in being. The choice is all yours.
3. Live in a tent (or a similarly transient lifestyle). If you’ve always wanted to live a vagabond’s life, now is your chance. After all, being in a relationship might interfere with your desire to hop from campsite to campsite, or call the wilderness your home.^[2]
   
   • This option is particularly great if you are young and love to travel. Living in a tent allows you to move about freely, without a house payment or rent, with only a few things to pack up before your next adventure.
   • You don't have to live in a tent to look at your life as an adventure with endless possibilities. Engage with the world around you, be curious, and say YES to every invitation!^[3]
4. Change jobs, if you don’t like your current job. Being in a relationship typically requires you to share your decision-making with another person. This can mean that you are stuck in a job you don’t love to provide security or peace of mind for someone else. If you’re single, you just have to make sure you can take care of yourself, so leave that job you hate behind, and chase a position you’ll love.^[4]
   
   • If you do quit your job, make sure you have another job lined up first: being single and (unintentionally) homeless is not quite as freeing as being single and financially stable.
5. Realize your time is your own. Being in a relationship, while it can be wonderful, means sharing your time and life with another person. Being single, you do not have to worry about letting someone else know if you plan to be out for the evening, or you’re off to make a grocery store run in the early morning--or even if you’d like to take a weekend vacation to another city. Having your time all to yourself can be quite empowering.^[5]
   
   • You do not have to fill up your spare time with activities. If being at home or taking long walks on your own makes you happy, go for it. Having time to yourself means having time to do what you love.
6. Focus on your friendships. Being single doesn’t have to mean being free from all relationships. It can also mean that you have more time and energy to put into your existing friendships. If you have a friend in need, you can rush to their aid without checking in with a partner. If your friends want to go on a trip to a music festival, there’s no one holding you back.^[6]
   
   • Some studies have found that single people can be happier. The key is to make sure you have strong, fulfilling friendships.
   • Remember that your friends are the family you choose. If you don’t have supportive, loving friends, make it a goal to find some. A supportive group of people around you can encourage you to try new things.^[7]

Making the Most of Your Time

1. Learn how to be on your own. Being on your own can be a wonderful thing. Learn how to take care of yourself properly, such as how to cook and clean for yourself, how to keep your home clean, how to wash laundry, and how to manage your time. All of these skills will be invaluable to you both as a singleton and as someone in a relationship.^[8]
   
   • This is not an easy task. You might have to start small, by making yourself breakfast each morning or making a point to iron your work shirts.
   • Taking care of yourself properly means different things to different people. Find what works best for you.
2. Learn a new skill. Take the free time you might otherwise be spending with your significant other and learn a new skill! Whether you sign up for one-on-one singing lessons with a professional, or you hop onto a site such as Skillshare to brush up on graphic design, learning a new skill will keep you busy and enrich your life.^[9]
   
   • Being single is a great time to experiment. If you start learning something new and don’t like it, move on to something else.
   • Once you’ve found your new skill, indulge in it.
3. Practice self-care. Providing the basics for yourself is great, but self-care is even more important. On top of making sure you are fed, groomed, and clean, you’ll need to make sure your “cup” is full. For some, that means taking time every morning to meditate and enjoy a slow cup of tea. For others, that might mean going to the gym four times per week to work on your physique.
   
   • Self-care will look different for everyone. When developing a self-care routine, identify what it is that makes you feel complete and relaxed day-to-day. Make that a priority.
4. Make (and meet) your goals. Make goals as a single person, and budget your time to accomplish them. You can make small goals, such as eating at least three meals per week at home, or you can make large goals, such as having a promotion by this time next year.
   
   • Make goals that matter to you, not anyone else. Doing so will get you further in life and will be far more important in motivating you to achieve your goals.
5. Focus on your career. Take the energy you may have spent on a relationship and pour it into your work. Even if you are not in a job that you hope to make a career of, you can improve your future career prospects by, perhaps, working your way up to manage your store, or building your body to fit the demands of a high-ranking labor position.^[10]
   

Preparing for a Relationship

1. Reflect on past relationships. Past relationships are great for teaching you about yourself and your future relationships. To prepare yourself for the possibility of a new relationship, identify any areas of your past that may have contributed to your break up. Notice anything you may have done to push your partner away or actions you may have done to be controlling or manipulative. Search for ways you can improve your behavior as a partner.^[11]
   
   • Don’t be afraid to take some time for yourself. You don’t need to jump from one relationship to another. Enjoy the in-between times and give yourself time to heal.
2. Work on your flaws. Take some time to reflect on your character, and notice any flaws you might have. Work on those to be a better partner and friend. This can be hard--no one wants to think about their flaws. But identifying and working on them will make you a better person, and will likely even increase your happiness.^[12]
   
   • Perhaps jealousy is a flaw for you. Practice being grateful for what you have.
   • Maybe manipulation comes easy to you. While single, practice saying what you mean, and being honest with yourself and others.
3. Evaluate your likes and dislikes. Many people forego their hobbies in favor of whatever their significant other likes. Take some time to evaluate your likes and dislikes, including your musical taste, your preferences regarding food, drink, and lifestyle, and even what you require from a relationship or partner. This will make you an invaluable partner, as you will know yourself well, and will not bow down to make other people happy.
   
   • This is another great time to experiment. Try new foods, music, or movies. Do activities you’ve never done before. You may discover things you love.
4. Seek help. If your aversion to your single life is insurmountable or feels too overwhelming to sort out by yourself, seek the help of a counselor or therapist. Although you might feel like you are alone in your struggle with being alone, plenty of people struggle to be both happy and single. A qualified professional can give you strategies to cope with your frustration, and may also be able to provide you with a fresh perspective on your situation.^[13]
   
5. Practice mindfulness. Finally, make some room for gratitude and mindfulness in your life. While single, notice the way food feels against your lips and tongue, notice the sounds you hear as you take your dog for a walk, or tune in to your feelings on a particularly stressful day. Mindfulness helps you know your body and mind thoroughly so that you can make more concrete decisions, and develop confidence and ease.^[14]
   
   • Mindfulness can be difficult when you are in a relationship, as a lot of your time and attention are diverted.

Video

Reader Videos

Tips

• Ignore what people think of your relationship status. Your life is yours, and not anyone else’s.
• Make the most of your single time by hanging out with your single friends. They might enjoy being unattached just as much as you.

Related WikiHows

• Enjoy Being Alone
• Enjoy Your Job
• Make Friends

References

Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://psyche.co/guides/how-to-defy-societys-singlism-and-embrace-independent-life
2. ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-be-ok-with-being-single/
3. ↑ [v161578_b01]. 29 September 2020.
4. ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-be-ok-with-being-single/
5. ↑ https://theawarenesscentre.com/being-single/
6. ↑ https://time.com/5401028/benefits-being-single-experts/
7. ↑ [v161578_b01]. 29 September 2020.
8. ↑ https://medium.com/mind-cafe/how-learning-to-enjoy-being-single-can-make-you-happier-46b03ea4af64
9. ↑ https://theawarenesscentre.com/being-single/
10. ↑ https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886922002513
11. ↑ https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.00746/full
12. ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-carol-morgan/if-you-dont-like-being-single-you-need-to-read-this_b_6294266.html
13. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/web-loneliness/201404/treating-loneliness-its-more-just-meeting-others
14. ↑ https://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/07-08/ce-corner